minna san~ genki? im bak peeps! haha... my blog is full of spiderwebs le la... everytym i feel lyk bloggin, i duno whr to start... and seein the las post jz maks it worst... but... here to say tt im fine... and to reply tags... been long... gomen...

advantage of the ordeal, i learnt tt i luv myself!!! haha proud of myself... and i grew stronger... though stuff lyk tis will stil happen n i'll stil break down... but i guess the period of tym will jz get shorter and shorter... hey... im human afterall yea?

disadvantages, i guess the wall between the inner me n peeps' gettin thicker... trust seems even further then before...
lonelier den ever... cos of the sudden break free from every1... on the bright side its counted as independence ba ... havin not to rely on ani1... cos i wud nvr noe when a helpin hand wud slip away and let me fall... rather den self-deceivin on bleak n false hopes... i wud rather stand alone, fall alone... n get back up... tis way no1 cn gain credit too :)

all's well now... so no worries yea? back to my normal bloggin... :)

hows every1s white day? in case ani1 dosen noe bout white day... i've got wiki's def... haha...

In Japan, Valentine's Day is observed by females who present chocolate gifts (either store-bought or handmade), usually to a male, as an expression of love. The handmade chocolate is usually preferred by the receiver, because it is a sign that the receiving male is the girl's "only one". On White Day, the converse happens: males who received a "honmei-choco" [chocolate of love] or "giri-choco" [courtesy chocolate] on Valentine's Day are expected to return the favor by giving gifts, usually more expensive.

so did you gals got ur expected gifts in return? if u did... gratx!!! haha... i'll be hangin round u gals more often hopin tt the "love" aura wud somehow diffuse into me... haha jk... as for me... did receive sum gifts but unexpected though... mostly outa frenship la... ARIGATOU!!! but in no mood for white day on sat lo... cos thrs dance n laoshi flared up la... well its ying gai de as me myself was seein red... i shant elaborate la... ruin my mood... be thankful tt u guys have crossed my mind kkaes? after dance.. went bugis wif Vian, Teh Chin n Ron... have to brin Teh CHIO go liang fu zhuang at golden landmark... goin wif this two jokers is simply entertainin... dey are lyk naturals la... just the conversation between dem can crack me up... after tt bot my BPP n went hme... my white day just pass lyk tt... -_- pathetic... i noe... well at least ive got gifts... haha...

today had dance again... well same same ba... scoldins... but haha u all deserve it... bleh!!! :p mean? too bad... make it diffi for us hu gave it so much... GTH man!!! and blur me knock my thumb wif the gun super hard la... stupid neh... str8 away orh cheh... the funny part is the guys tryin to teach me the dance dey learn durin the SW workshop... i gues its kinda cool... but dun c it in dem... wahaha... Teh CHIO... if u c tis... dun kill me... haha... hu ask u tink i shen tong... teach so fast... haha... And bin dyin to dance anyhow art... bin pesterrin Vivian bout it... Mr Quek!!! c we shi shi ke ke dian ji zhe ni o!!! haha... so yeap DANCED!!! nvr cui!!! but i knock dao my pi gu... haha... anw ive decided tt if my healths fine... i'll join SW... cos the dancer in me will nvr die de... o well... type alot le... lil sianx... so yea...

just wana say...

arigatou~ zutto soba ni ite kurete~ [applies to all tt luv me o!!! luv ya... muackx!!! XD]

gomen, no pics~ lazy :p

i tot my heart was strong...
tot it was made of steel...
nth can make it bleed any more...
until my nitemare played rite b4 my eyes... again...

neither deprive of love... nor deprive of care...
tot i could forgo the one n onli ting i once treasure so dear...
but i finally noe...
i cant...

tot tings were turning for the better...
tot tings weren't turnin bak to wat it used to...
but the tables turned on me again...
my heart's aching, my head's in a mess...

pondering on wat made me broke my promise...
a promise to myself...
never to let anitin...
cause my heart so much misery...

through years...
i've lived up to it...
but stil its my weak point...
no matter how hard i try not to admit... it still is...

made me hard to trust myself and every1 else...
gues its a form of protection...
form of illusion
to make it seem lyk nth could make me break...

but still im lyk the old me...
cryin alone in the dark for the same damn ting...
at the same time punching the wall...
hating me for chnging back to the weakling i used to be...

eyes sore...
body weak...
heart aching...
head swirling...

no improvement no nothing...
tot i was made of steel...
tot i could live without it... without feelin afraid...
but im stil me and it was all jz naive tots...



no comments allowed... thx...

minna san~ im stil not bloggin wif pics... haha too lazy... shall do it on weekends... today wen UCC o... syf rehearsals... and memories of the 1st yr came bak... haha... woke up super early de... hai dao me aftr syf goong goong... all went well... jz tt the bus ride was horrible... stupid bus driver wif no skills... and worst stil, traffic jam!!! so the trip was excruciatin... on the verge of pukin... wen i got down i totally felt sick... so was lyk leanin against the pillar... those hu toked to me say i sounded v sexy? lolx... say tt onli i sick tt tym wil appear v sexy... -_- bus ride home was fine... haha... reach sch... lunched... slack at ava... tied scorpions... haha while waitin for 12.20 to go bak to clas... i luk super xiao mei mei la... and luk lyk frm nanhua de... haha... was hesitatin whether to go bak to clas anot cos v paiseh... o well... since tie le jiu go bak lo... yea kip bein said lyk xiao mei mei... greatest comment is cute... but it meant ugly but adorable? haha and sum guys were amazed at how i tie it? lolx... super lame la u guys... aftr sch wen to Vian's clas... chat wif peeps den head hme... n gues wat... so long le... i stil got the motion sickness feelin neh... o well... N!!! i feel lyk doin alot of tings... 1st... PIZZA... Phyllan, is go pizza hut eat not eat pizza hut... i clear liao... haha... 2nd: kbox!!! Cloe n peeps ask me go la... but sry neh... not feelin well... 3rd: movie!!! but duno gt wat nice films now lo... if got i shall go wif Hsinlu... sun bian go shoppin!!! haha... 4th: i wana eat beard papa la!!! haha tts lyk always de lo... y cnt bpp jz open a small lil stall below my block? or rite at my door step? haha... so many cravins... so lil tym n energy... kip feelin cui... Fatigue Level HIGH!!! n upcoming thurs fri sat all got dance -_-... so i guess if wana go out only cn fri nite... if im stil alive... n sat aftrnn til nite if im stil alive... haha...

CCHYID jiayou o!!! since we've put in so much effort... we should continue to strive... to achieve our ultimate goal!!! no matter wat the outcome... i hope tt every1 wudnt be filled wif regret aftr syf... be happi tt we did our best n we learnt alot from it...lastly i wil jiayou too o :)

ps: D, im doin well :)

minna san~ nvr been bloggin properly as nth interestin happen... n i was feelin super horrible truout the days... anw shall blog b4 i go orh orh again... shall introduce a song to those hu duno it yet... its IF I WERE A BOY by Beyonce feat R. Kelly... the original is only by Beyonce... its bout a heartbreakin story... duh!!! n she was lyk sayin if she was a boy she would do tis and tt for her girl... in the R. Kelly remix its placed in a way tt he is answerin to her sayin tt its cos shes not a boy... simple lyrics but so tru... but i guess it should be " i use to be a girl, now am a boy" haha... cos if she werent a girl b4 how wud she noe all the pains tt a guy put her tru? so if she was jz born as a guy... she wud surely jz make mistakes lyk others... tis brings us to another topic... nobody's perfect...
ppl tend to tink tt others are perfect... but tink twice... arent u jz breachin high hopes of tt person? mayb tt person in ur mind is jz a "gao gu" ver. of him or her? hard to explain la... hence wen discovered tt the person aint so perfect as expected... conflicts start to spark... omg now im speakin lyk sum Aunt Agony... shoot! jz my 2 cents worth o... shall stop here den...
the song reali v simple n nice... go hear it for urself... :) XOXO zzzZZZZ