Wednesday, July 1, 2009

minna konbawa~ wanted to post on the first 3 days back at sch... TORTURE!!! haha new timetable and thrs lyk this 3 period straight in one day... totalli excruciatin... not to mention tons of hw and the upcoming prelimns... anw i realised lots of tings in these few days... but i shant go into the emo sides of it... one realisation is one tt i've always known... which is if thrs a start thrs always an end... but i realise mayb tts the tings tts holdin me back? makin me reluctant to accept new stuff... cos the tot of startin somethin which would eventually end scares me... so in order not to lose anything i rather not have anythin in the 1st place... tts wat ive always tot... but i guess i shant keep this mindset at all... cause without startin i would always b running on the spot... tts one cowardly act tt i always wanna change... another kinda cowards tt i encounter is many aroun me who starts something... and when it ends... it seems like their world crumbled... i guess this is oso another reason y i dun even wana start anything... judgin from ppl around me... it may not seem lyk a good idea to follow their steps... and furthermore i always have to be a shelter for dem whenever their world starts crumblin down... so i cnt afford to crumble wif dem... or mayb its the competitive me inside tt is afraid to face the fact tt mayb im not tt strong afterall... and tt my world cn go crumblin down into rubble within secs... so mayb im the zui coward de? thus i conclude such realisations are bo liao... gets u no whr... cos no one reali have a perfect solution... oya! thrs no such ting as perfect... godamnit... RMBR TT!!! which brings me to another topic... how cn a perfectionist be perfect when tings arent suppose to b perfect in the 1st place? my art cher always tells me not to b a perfectionist when it comes to art... but its a bad habit i cnt chnge... so someone please save me... HAHA XD enough of the realisation dumb tots tingy...

fri is the start of prelims 1... im doomed for sure... no drive to do stuff i dun lyk... but o well... i found a source of motivation somehow... little one la... cos my own tots still overweigh everything... haha... but tt motivation somehow is quite magical... i din tot it would wrk... but it sure did... yay! so im gonna try to enjoy studyin... lyk wth rite? yea im turnin into a geek for the upcoming months... lyk ive always said durin SYF periods or any hard times... "ao guo jiu shi wo men de!!!" haha... hence... im gonna be ENDURING DANCELESS DAYS... TURNING INTO MUGGER PHASE... urgh... so off to hit the fun and interesting textbooks... yea rite... i myself aint convinced at all... o well...

ps: please stay healthy everyone :)
pps: jazmond tt bo liao person say must mention him on my blog... here u are... HAHA super ENG lo u... geniuses no nid study... onli hang at jammin studio all tt cn ACE everything... gth la... :p
ppps: pardon my eng today... kinda weird to phrase my tots today neh... duno y... mayb cos in bloggin wif eyes half open? and my brain is in lala land? o well tym for caffeine intake...

oyasumi~

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