konbachiwa... today sucks... these days suck so much tt i transforming into emo kid... shinjirarenai...

anw just here to make a wish... and to thank someone who was always thr for me for the past month... keepin me company tru nites of chiongin art... buy and store boxes of cream puff everyday... and deliverin them to my doorstep on stressful days when im being unreasonable... only u would think of such a way to satisfy my stupid cravins for cream puffs at midnight...

not long ago, i asked u during a phonecall tt its not lyk i would wana eat cream puff everyday, so wat happens to all the other cream puffs and i rmbred u said u ate those cos u knew if u hadnt i would be like "think u got alot money jiu cn buy and throw away izit?" But i know u dun fancy dem cos u nvr liked sweet stuff.

and if not for you i guessed i would have broken down long ago with all the shit happening... cos u was always thr to force positive vibes into me... and shouldered all the negativity...

i was glad u came back even if its just a month and that u have to go again... even tho stubborn me chose to stick to my choice... lettin u go again wasnt an easy task... and i noe its the same for u... hence today i wasnt able to see u off at the airport... i just could not bring myself to...

all in all... i did not regret having u back in my life for the month... once again, it tells me how much i treasure u as a fren... so please stay safe, healthy and happy.

Even tho u, being an anti-blog person, wouldnt read this... which is exactly my pt... i would still like to say Thx D.

konbachiwa... here to lash out all the negativity im feelin... im tired... all the shit happenin around me... and tryin to act like its fine is really getting in on me after having lived tt way for 16 yrs... lucky i have frens who keep my head clear instead of it steering its own into the dark side... but seriously i feel dumb... haven i learnt my lesson after 16 freakin yrs? the ans is no i have not... and seriously i wonder why... mayb im just a masochist... or just plain dumb... what was i even expecting from dem... mayb i just loved the few secs of joy and thinkin tt hey dey arent tt bad or dey changed... F no... and rite i shudnt think tt dey arent tt bad... i shud b thinking hey finally im gd enough for dem... and even tho now im at the place i wanted to be at and with the person i wanted to be with most... i dun feel a little relief at all... at least i dun allow myself to... all of this is endin soon so why depend on it... why think that its a happy picture when alls gonna burn up the next second... in the end i'll just feel as miserable as the last time... gettin me no where... its the same as not improvin which sucked... seriously, i gotta learnt...

POA: do not ask an sick guy or comment "are you crazy?" it gets you nowhere cos insane peeps will just say " im crazy bout u" cheesy but hey its stil happening now alright... sick ppl stil do exist... watchout...

minna~ here to update on current feelins... its lyk 1.18 in the mornin and im still not aslp... prelim2 resumes tmrw... haixx... most dreaded physics n amaths... heck la... no drive anw... too much stuff on my mind...

anw got to noe tt my yamapi is down with flu!!! when i heard... i was lyk damn worried... yea typical fangirl... but cnt hlp it... luckily it wasnt the h1n1... guess he has been busy with drama filmin and 24hr teleV programme ba... tts y after the 24hr TV ryo and him fall sick? haixx... all fangirls must be so worried now...

enuff of fangirl moments... wanna say tt last nite had a v weird dream... a dream tt i wun talk in detail... just plain weird... wish i had this decipher tingy for dreams... aint a nitemare lyk the ones i always get... considered a gd dream? with characters tt are quite distant from me now... v weird... and it has lyk diff chaps of same person? damn freaky lo... once again... its not a nitemare!!! tts wats freaky... cos i normally either have nitemares or dun hv dreams... im a dreamless person... and normally for nitemares i cn easily figure dem out as its normally bout the same probs ive been dwellin on... but this dream was diff... how weird... feel like sharin... but as to not cause misunderstandins... i shall keep mum... but anw woke up this morning in a happy mood de... cos of the dream... ridiculous but true... but it din last long la... too much on my mind till the good vibes arent enuf as a distraction... stil... i would like to get to the bottom of this dream... haha... maybe its a sub conscious tingy? aiya wakaranai... i shall go slp le... wonder if i will have the same dream?

oyasumi~~~ ashita ganbarimasu...

ohaiyo~ its real early and im postin... haha now its 6.42am on a tuesday morning... just wana random post... cos stupid me woke up early on a tuesday!!! suppose to go to school at 8.30 and i woke up at 5.30... wat a retard... arh whateva... prelims2 period now... today is ENGLISH!!! yay!!! haha... been really busy this few weeks tryin to get my olvl art coursewrk done as it dues friday... which clashes with all the prelims exams... so prelims priority or art? really in a dilemma last week... but well greedy me is goin to juggle both!!! so i guess on friday evening i'll be dead at hme la... damn dumb lo... the person who pai the timetable... hate the person... after friday got lyk 4 days holi? til next paper? for wat la!!! den need to rush my art which clash with prelims?!? *^$%*^%&*^%!@#$ urgh!!! haixx shant complain much... cos if i reali do... this whole post is just not enough... wateva it is... ganbarimasu!!! guo le jiu shi wo de le!!! Yoshi!!!

minna~ konbawa~ kyou wa ureshii desu... actually ive been feelin happy since ytd... haha... nt so much bout the fact tt prelim1 is over but much more the fact tt i slpt for 21 hrs str8 and the luck i had :) haha... yup tts rite 21 hrs... cos wed was my las exam day... havin chem n phy p1 and art... on tues nite... chiong art prep... til morning... nvr slp o... the mi jue is to gulp down 3 doze of chicken essence, 2 bottles of coke and a few cups of coffee... haha...it wrks... but was so cui after my art paper... hence head str8 back hme without da bao-in anything back to eat... bathe, touched my bed and immediately unconscious... haha... it was round 1 in the aftrnn? and the next ting i noe was to wake up at 10 the next day... cool huh? quite a gd way to jian fei and safe money on food neh? haha... anw thurs was a school day... but cos i fin all my papers... i dun nid go sch!!! wahaha!!! went out shoppin wif LS...

went to lots places lo... but in the end bought clothes at marina... AND... thrs tis cute caucasian salesman... of skincare products ba... he stopped us and gave us samples... he asked how old were we... answered 16 and he was lyk kinda shock? cos we dun look 16 from the way we dress... so he was lyk... ooo tis could b kinda costly... i was shock lo... whr got ppl say their products costly de... so i tot he was quite nice and real... and den he said if we wana hear on or something lyk tt la... we answerd its okay... we're fine... so we said our goodbyes and he was all frenly and such saying "bye my supermodels!" haha so cute lo... LS and i were lyk tinkin in wat way are we considered models? we dun even hav one basic tingy which is height... haha...the most is lyk those cover models? cos no1 cn judge our height and alot of photoshop cn b done... haha... seriously he is cute... and not lyk typical salesperson hu insist their products are affordable and tt when u say u r nt interested their face turns black lyk immediately... cute salesperson made my day!!! and to emphasise more on my luck... i crossed many roads tt day... but all traffic lights turn green whenever i reach the crossing... super zhun de... haha... tis might seem trivia... but well i hate waitin for the lil green man... especially at orchard... it usually takes centuries... i aint kiddin... went hme quite early... cos have to eat dinner den go out for Ksession... fun as usual... head hme at an "illegal hr" haha

ok today... well started off bad... cos got sch and im sufferin from lack of slp... day started wif tests... right after prelims... wth rite? i noe~ after tt kinda free... so had tis QnA bout harry potter wif my pro frens... dey are lyk loyal fans... i din read the book so i have many doubts... but dey are able to answer any qns... cool!!! salute! aftr sch... went BH for lunch cos 2.45 got chem sup... urgh a whole 2 hrs b4 supp... such a waste of tym... in the end reach hme at roun 4 plus when actuali my day shud end at 12 plus... its a friday for goodness sake... urgh nvm... chnged and went out again... met my bro at raffles place... damn funny... he was lyk in front of me and i din see him... he had to wave into my face... den i notice... haha... anw we were both listenin to mp3 wif earpiece stuck in our ears and both wif shades indoors... tis proves we're siblings!!! haha... waited for mum to fang gong... so walked round wif him... den met mum and went for dinner... after tt bro went hme 1st and mum and me went shoppin!!! got shoes a top and some other stuff... den STOMACHACHE!!! damnit... always lyk tt de lo... irritatin... i tot i was gonna faint... lyk cramp... bt not lo... so i had to shorten my shoppin trip and cab hme... mum agreed and we were lyk lookin for the taxi stand... at tt tym at wisma... went over to a security and asked... he was super nice!!! but im mean... haha... tricked him... owell... white lie... he was lyk "follow me... i'll bring you guys to the taxi stand." mum and i exchanged looks... tinkin y is he so nice... haha... den on the way up to the taxi stand ppl keep lookin at us... lyk y got security escortin us... haha... and mayb i looked lyk a foreigner... wif the already fair skin... wearin white which reflects light onto my face... makin it even fairer... and wearin big shades indoors... haha... indeed today alot ppl stared cos i wore shades and my dressin ba... nvr see b4 meh? lolx... anw the security guard oso ask my mum.... "are u guys foreigners? is she a japanese?" and pointed at me... haha... so happy to hear tt neh... haha... mum din reali react just smiled... he reali did escort us to the taxi stand... mum said thx and i said "domo arigatou ne" wif a lil bow/nod tingy... HAHA and he was lyk smiling... wif other ppl starin again... im sry tt i trickd u... honto gomen... but reali happy cos u tot i jap mah... and dun wana pour wet water... gomenasai~ u reali v nice o! haha... anw hop on a cab... and the driver is GOOD! fast and smooth... just wat i need comfort and speed... thnk god... reach hme real soon... lucky eh? bathe,rest and now sittin on bed... bloggin... haha :) LS just msged me... said to book my time for shoppin after prelim2... book early in case i sold out... haha i hot cake arh? say til lyk i object... haha... k lah... been really happy tis few days neh... learnt to search for "small happiness in everday life" a phrase by yamapi which he belives in too!!! haha k lah... minna oyasumi~ stay happy and healthy!!! tts the most impt...

ps: update on buzzer beat... yamapi did not propose... he ask his "gf" if he win the final bball match would she marry him? but he did nt win... so haha!!! sad tt he didnt win... but happy tt he did not marry her... she baddie de!!! GTH ba... super ji dong...

pps: danceless days are excruciating... just lyk the excruciating pain in my back... urgh...